While reading this article, I can only reiterate my issues with abstinence only education. I have no problem telling kids that they should wait, that they should be prepared. I also have no issue explaining that the only thing that is 100% effective is abstinence. But I also think that kids, of appropriate ages, should get the whole facts about sex. I mean really, for heaven's sakes:
The survey of 1,800 people age 18 to 29 was conducted by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy....Myths about pregnancy and sexual activity continue to permeate circles of young people. For instance, 28 percent of men incorrectly believe they will get extra protection from wearing two condoms at once, a practice that actually leads to condom breakage. At the same time, 18 percent of men wrongly believe that having sex standing up reduces the chance that they will get a female partner pregnant. (Emphasis mine)
This is the problem with abstinence only education! To mislead our kids and give them false information not only showcases a lack of trust and honesty with our kids, but it sets them up for failure and disappointment. It also shows that we don't think we've done a good enough job raising them because we feel the need to lie to them instead of simply explaining the situation at hand.
To quote an episode of Roseanne:
Now of course, I have no children, so anything I have to say could be biased based upon the fact that I've never had to sit a child down and discuss this. But at the same time, I was raised this way. My parents were never shy about anything. I remember being on the way to religious school, asking my dad what each of the different curse words meant and having him explain them to me.
Schoolhouse rock was right. Knowledge is power!
To quote an episode of Roseanne:
Jackie: Remember, Mom told us that if we let a boy go all the way, we'd be called loose or slutty. Like that was gonna stop us.The truth works far better than any lie. And it's also much scarier. But it has to be the whole truth. Telling our kids that putting a condom on will give you a disease or that taking birth control guarantees cancer just leads them to believe that not doing either is better for them. It's best to explain the pros and cons of each aspect. That yes, taking birth control can raise your risk for certain cancers, but it can also help regulate a woman whose periods never come regularly. That yes, having sex with a condom is safer than not, but that you also need to use a condom or dental dam whenever possible even with oral sex. The number of young people out there who don't believe oral sex to be sex is astounding. I have seen studies (here, here, and here) where people don't recognize the fact that they can get cancer from HPV in their throats from oral sex. If they used a condom or a dental dam, they wouldn't need to worry.
Roseanne: Yeah. She shoulda told us we'd be called Mommy.
Now of course, I have no children, so anything I have to say could be biased based upon the fact that I've never had to sit a child down and discuss this. But at the same time, I was raised this way. My parents were never shy about anything. I remember being on the way to religious school, asking my dad what each of the different curse words meant and having him explain them to me.
Schoolhouse rock was right. Knowledge is power!
2 comments:
To be fair, the myths cited in the article do not sound like the type of ignorance that would come about from abstinence-only education. In fact, it seems like just the opposite. An imaginary over-the-top abstinence-only program, I would think, would teach things like, "one condom will give you cancer; two will make your penis fall off."
Just sayin' that I don't see how it relates to AO education anymore than just plain ignorance.
And I can accept that as a theory. But it does mean that both the schools that these people went to were severely undereducated these people and their parents decided that it was not an important subject to broach at home. So still, the emphasis on education and knowledge exists.
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